Showing posts from 2017

The Curse of Singleness

For the most part, I think many would agree that society and media places romantic relationships on a high pedestal. We see it on the television screen, we see it in novels, we see it in the theatres, and on social media (#relationshipgoals). And the world encourages each and everyone of us to pursue a romantic relationship of whatever kind, as long as it feels good and you are following the desires of your heart, no matter what it means. The world says "you will be fulfilled when you are in a relationship". So what does that mean for the single person who hasn't found "the one" yet? It could mean loneliness, it could mean sadness and depression of sorts, and as many have so lovingly claimed for me on my behalf, it means "a lack of fulfillment". Oh, the curse of singleness! But reader, let me be clear, singleness is not a curse. "Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift

Two Mornings After

I can't even begin to describe the response to my post and what God has been doing in just the past 24 hours. It is INSANE. So many of you have been asking me how i'm holding up, how i'm doing; thank you for your care and concern! I'm doing great, God is good and my heart is just overflowing with joy.  You wouldn't think that posting about your deepest darkest secret online, especially when it is so controversial and against what the world is saying would bring you great joy but all glory to God because he has filled my heart with endless praise and thanksgiving. I find myself singing, dancing and leaping because God is so good and so faithful!  I have received countless messages of encouragement, support and love from brothers and sisters in Christ, even from ones I don't know, and even from my unbelieving friends. Some have shared that they wrestle with similar struggles, others have shared how the post has opened and allowed gospel conversations, man

Struggling with Same-Sex Attraction

I struggle with same-sex attraction (SSA). It has been (and is still) an on-going journey of confusion, frustration, and trial, but by God’s grace, one also of encouragement and sanctification. I've waited many years to finally share this part of my life online, not because I'm looking for pity or attention, but because a) this blog is where I've shared my life and how God has been growing me, and this is most definitely a big part of it, and b) because I'm sure that there are many others who may be in a similar situation and I hope this encourages, comforts, and challenges them, as well as anyone else that may be reading this. Before I begin to share, I wanted to point out a subtle but substantial difference in definitions. I do not identify myself as being gay. But I would say that I struggle with same-sex attraction. There are big implications between the two and they are not the same. In today's society, the term "gay" or "homosexual"

Too Fast

Today was a good day, but it fell short when the day ended a bit sour. After a full day of hanging out with friends, I was driving home and as I approached a bend before pulling into my parking space, I had to quickly turn to avoid a vehicle that was there. Successfully pulling into my spot, I noticed that the other car came and parked in the space right next to me and I thought "oh this is gonna be awkward".  I got out of my car and with his window down he said to me "I'm the president of this complex and you were driving way too fast here, so fast that you had swerve to avoid my car. You cannot be driving like this. I'm going to take your license plate number and if I see you driving like that again, you'll be sure to get a notice." Embarrassed, I nodded and thanked him for warning me and went inside. I felt horrible. I'm not usually one that gets into trouble even when I was young, but when I do, it shakes me up. I felt bad for breaking ru

Doubly Blessed

It's family day weekend! It was a pleasure to be home with family and friends. I've really missed some of them and it was a delight catching up with them even though my time at home was cut short (no reading week for this working man!). But, it's weekends like this that I find myself incredibly torn.  It has always been a struggle for me the past year or so, as convocation and my future approached, figuring out what was next for me. Would I stay in Guelph? Would I go back to Toronto? I've really enjoy being here in Guelph and God has graciously snuggled me into a wonderful gospel-centred community here - I am challenged by great biblical preaching, and I am loved by a hospitable, friendly and warm body of Christ which God has graciously given me. Home on the other hand, is home - it's where i've grown up, my parents, my childhood, and there is also another beautiful community of knit and edifying friendships that I thank God for.  I've learnt that

Waiting on God

In today's culture, everything is fast, quick and immediate - from microwave dinners to social media apps, we, especially those in first world countries are incredibly privileged and blessed to have so much at our disposal. If there's something we want, we can get it. If we're hungry, we eat. If we're tired, we sleep. If we're bored, the Internet is readily at our fingertips with 300 hours of video footage being uploaded to YouTube every hour. In a world where we can have all we want and when we want, what does it means to wait? I've really been wrestling and pondering over the idea of waiting recently, particularly, waiting on God. 2017 is well underway, and I actually have quite a few major changes coming up in a few months. By the end of April, there's a pretty good chance that i'll have to move out of the house i've been living in for the past 3 years (which has absolutely been an incredible gift from God), and by the end of August, my intern